I Need A Husband!
For as long as I can remember, I have always been mesmerized by the subject of "love" and "romance". I mean who hasn't right??
Of course, I didn't know much about love at the time, but I sure did like the feeling. By the time I was thirteen I had had my first kiss and I was heavily addicted to "romance" novels, much to the chagrin of my parents. Where did I get introduced to these books? In high school. I wondered years after, why they would have allowed for these books to be in the school library if they didn't want us to read them.
Needless to say, this habit set off a chain of reactions that quickly spiraled out of control. I was so engrossed in these books that I lost the desire to study my school work and my desire for spiritual exercises; as if I needed another distraction. In order to read them, I would have to hide them, and then I'd have to stay up late at night and try reading them from the dim street light that was streaming through my bedroom window.
Whelp, I suffered a loss of sleep, and pretty soon, I couldn't be bothered any more. Even though I had given up on the romance novels, the idea of having this perfect creature come save me and make passionate, breath taking love to me, stayed with me for years. But you know what? The damage was already done. A false picture of men, marriage, love and sex was ingrained in my head, forever. So now he had to be tall, handsome, rich and the whole nine yards. Anything less and a brother wasn't doing it for a sister. The greater problem was though, that I felt my life was incomplete, boring and useless without a man.
Fast forward to the year 2012 when I was first introduced to this passage of scripture in Isaiah 54:5 For thy Maker is thine husband; the Lord of hosts is His name: and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall He be called. KJV
Mmm mm. No thanks. I don't think so. I really didn't want to hear that. My heart rebelled when I read that. All I could think was, "Uh uhhh. I need a huusssband".
This is what I said to God...
I was like, seriously, Lord? You can't be my husband. I can't see you,touch you and I certainly can't make love to you. Yes, I went there. I need a man with flesh I can see, who will pamper me, be patient with me, relieve my burdens, good with kids , be a good helper around the house, like to work hard, like listening to me, knows my moods and how to "handle" me when they hit. My list was actually much longer but I will spare you lol. Well don't get me started on his physical characteristics.
And this is what God had to say. Mathew 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you.KJV
Howeverr...
I was seeking after a man who would fulfill me completely. He had to know me so well and cater to all my needs. Sounds ridiculous, right? I was wanting from a human being, what God alone could do for me. I wanted what I read in all the romance novels. The perfect images that were forever painted in my mind, came back to haunt me in my adulthood.
It was now difficult to relate to men in the real world because of the high standards I held them to. I was looking for superman. But he didn't exist.
Ladies. Jesus is your superman and He is ALL you need.
I learned this the hard way after a failed marriage. I couldn't blame the person. I had made my own choice and I realized that it was unfair for me to expect something from someone who was incapable of it. I had to ask God's forgiveness for putting men above Him. I had to ask Him to forgive me for idolizing my husband; even though I knew he wasn't perfect. I had to ask for forgiveness for putting men before Him instead of seeking Him first.
And you know what? God showed me, and continues to show me, that He truly is my husband. He has been providing everything that's needed for me and my children. He has been constantly comforting me. He hears everything I have to say whether or not it's something good. He is always open to listening to my complaints(I'm learning not to complain as much by His grace). He knows my moods and how to make my day. Literally. I have personally witnessed how He took a day I thought was going to be hard and a drag, and made it turn out so well, it couldn't have been made better. I was just in awe at how even the days that seem to be a drag, God cares about. There is really nothing He isn't concerned about that has to do with us.
Can any sane person really expect that from a mere human being? That would be more than unreasonable. We don't even realize what we're doing when we do it. We are making them our god, is what we're doing. Is it any wonder then that we fall apart at the slightest suspicion we have of our spouse or boyfriend? We're not even sure they've committed a wrong but we're already in the throes of a "woe is me"session. Some of us are seconds away from a mental breakdown even if there is the slightest suspicion.
This is because they have become everything to us. We hang our whole lives on them and become so absorbed with them that it is difficult for us to hear or see reason from those around us, much less God.
You know what I've seen from my own experience? Much of the time, although not all of the time, if we were to be really honest with ourselves, when we find ourselves in these situations with these men, it was because of our own bad choices anyway. We need to let God choose for us and let Him be first in our relationships.
Now let me make something very clear so there is no misunderstanding. I'm not saying that it is OK for our spouses to cheat. That is wrong. God is very displeased with that sort of behavior. I am merely focusing on the mindset we ought to have as women of God. Our first response is to go to God. Realize that men are flesh and blood just as we are and we need to pray for their souls diligently.They have weaknesses and struggles just as we do. If we aren't perfect, we can't expect them to be.
So ladies. Release them from that burden. Make God your everything and He promises to make all things beautiful in HIS time.
That is what this whole blog is about. Knowing that God is first in our lives. He is our everything and we can be happy in our singleness or our marriage, as long as God is our main focus. If you're single, know that you can be content just doing what He asks you to do until such time as He sees fit to bless you with a husband. If you're already married, God still needs to be first. It is even more important for you to see that without Him being first in your life, and then first in your marriage, nothing in your marriage is going to go well.
God is stepping in now and demanding His rightful place in our hearts. He is the one who created us. He is the one who redeemed and saved us and He alone will sustain us throughout eternity, if we let Him. Nothing and no one can take His place, so let's put down the idols in our lives and return Him to the throne of our heart.
If you don't have a boyfriend or husband then you still need to practice allowing God to be first in your life; not mom, dad, professor, pastor,best friend or anyone else. Start preparing now for when God chooses to bless you with that spouse. But rather than focusing on when your're gonna get a man, ask Him to keep your focus on Him, and to be so engrossed with Him, so you will realize that the husband is only an additional blessing, rather than your whole reason for living.
See, anything can be an idol. And for someone or something who is incapable of doing what God can do for you to take His place in your life, is just plain crazy. Think about it. Put God back to His rightful place in your life today. Blessings to you my loves!
PRAYING FOR YOU!!!
A Woman's Place
Of course, I didn't know much about love at the time, but I sure did like the feeling. By the time I was thirteen I had had my first kiss and I was heavily addicted to "romance" novels, much to the chagrin of my parents. Where did I get introduced to these books? In high school. I wondered years after, why they would have allowed for these books to be in the school library if they didn't want us to read them.
Needless to say, this habit set off a chain of reactions that quickly spiraled out of control. I was so engrossed in these books that I lost the desire to study my school work and my desire for spiritual exercises; as if I needed another distraction. In order to read them, I would have to hide them, and then I'd have to stay up late at night and try reading them from the dim street light that was streaming through my bedroom window.
Whelp, I suffered a loss of sleep, and pretty soon, I couldn't be bothered any more. Even though I had given up on the romance novels, the idea of having this perfect creature come save me and make passionate, breath taking love to me, stayed with me for years. But you know what? The damage was already done. A false picture of men, marriage, love and sex was ingrained in my head, forever. So now he had to be tall, handsome, rich and the whole nine yards. Anything less and a brother wasn't doing it for a sister. The greater problem was though, that I felt my life was incomplete, boring and useless without a man.
Fast forward to the year 2012 when I was first introduced to this passage of scripture in Isaiah 54:5 For thy Maker is thine husband; the Lord of hosts is His name: and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God of the whole earth shall He be called. KJV
Mmm mm. No thanks. I don't think so. I really didn't want to hear that. My heart rebelled when I read that. All I could think was, "Uh uhhh. I need a huusssband".
This is what I said to God...
I was like, seriously, Lord? You can't be my husband. I can't see you,touch you and I certainly can't make love to you. Yes, I went there. I need a man with flesh I can see, who will pamper me, be patient with me, relieve my burdens, good with kids , be a good helper around the house, like to work hard, like listening to me, knows my moods and how to "handle" me when they hit. My list was actually much longer but I will spare you lol. Well don't get me started on his physical characteristics.
And this is what God had to say. Mathew 6:33 But seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you.KJV
Howeverr...
I was seeking after a man who would fulfill me completely. He had to know me so well and cater to all my needs. Sounds ridiculous, right? I was wanting from a human being, what God alone could do for me. I wanted what I read in all the romance novels. The perfect images that were forever painted in my mind, came back to haunt me in my adulthood.
It was now difficult to relate to men in the real world because of the high standards I held them to. I was looking for superman. But he didn't exist.
Ladies. Jesus is your superman and He is ALL you need.
I learned this the hard way after a failed marriage. I couldn't blame the person. I had made my own choice and I realized that it was unfair for me to expect something from someone who was incapable of it. I had to ask God's forgiveness for putting men above Him. I had to ask Him to forgive me for idolizing my husband; even though I knew he wasn't perfect. I had to ask for forgiveness for putting men before Him instead of seeking Him first.
And you know what? God showed me, and continues to show me, that He truly is my husband. He has been providing everything that's needed for me and my children. He has been constantly comforting me. He hears everything I have to say whether or not it's something good. He is always open to listening to my complaints(I'm learning not to complain as much by His grace). He knows my moods and how to make my day. Literally. I have personally witnessed how He took a day I thought was going to be hard and a drag, and made it turn out so well, it couldn't have been made better. I was just in awe at how even the days that seem to be a drag, God cares about. There is really nothing He isn't concerned about that has to do with us.
Can any sane person really expect that from a mere human being? That would be more than unreasonable. We don't even realize what we're doing when we do it. We are making them our god, is what we're doing. Is it any wonder then that we fall apart at the slightest suspicion we have of our spouse or boyfriend? We're not even sure they've committed a wrong but we're already in the throes of a "woe is me"session. Some of us are seconds away from a mental breakdown even if there is the slightest suspicion.
This is because they have become everything to us. We hang our whole lives on them and become so absorbed with them that it is difficult for us to hear or see reason from those around us, much less God.
You know what I've seen from my own experience? Much of the time, although not all of the time, if we were to be really honest with ourselves, when we find ourselves in these situations with these men, it was because of our own bad choices anyway. We need to let God choose for us and let Him be first in our relationships.
Now let me make something very clear so there is no misunderstanding. I'm not saying that it is OK for our spouses to cheat. That is wrong. God is very displeased with that sort of behavior. I am merely focusing on the mindset we ought to have as women of God. Our first response is to go to God. Realize that men are flesh and blood just as we are and we need to pray for their souls diligently.They have weaknesses and struggles just as we do. If we aren't perfect, we can't expect them to be.
So ladies. Release them from that burden. Make God your everything and He promises to make all things beautiful in HIS time.
That is what this whole blog is about. Knowing that God is first in our lives. He is our everything and we can be happy in our singleness or our marriage, as long as God is our main focus. If you're single, know that you can be content just doing what He asks you to do until such time as He sees fit to bless you with a husband. If you're already married, God still needs to be first. It is even more important for you to see that without Him being first in your life, and then first in your marriage, nothing in your marriage is going to go well.
God is stepping in now and demanding His rightful place in our hearts. He is the one who created us. He is the one who redeemed and saved us and He alone will sustain us throughout eternity, if we let Him. Nothing and no one can take His place, so let's put down the idols in our lives and return Him to the throne of our heart.
If you don't have a boyfriend or husband then you still need to practice allowing God to be first in your life; not mom, dad, professor, pastor,best friend or anyone else. Start preparing now for when God chooses to bless you with that spouse. But rather than focusing on when your're gonna get a man, ask Him to keep your focus on Him, and to be so engrossed with Him, so you will realize that the husband is only an additional blessing, rather than your whole reason for living.
See, anything can be an idol. And for someone or something who is incapable of doing what God can do for you to take His place in your life, is just plain crazy. Think about it. Put God back to His rightful place in your life today. Blessings to you my loves!
PRAYING FOR YOU!!!
A Woman's Place
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